Some time ago, I participated in an authors’ group blog called “The Ink Ladies.” One of the members challenged the rest of us to come up with a list of “Ten Literary Characters I Would Totally Make Out With If I Were Single and They Were Real But I’m Not, Single I Mean, I Am Real, But I’m Also Happily Married and Want to Stay That Way So Maybe We Should Forget This.”
Well, I’m single, so I was game to play. Below is what came of it: a list of luscious literary males who don’t really exist, except in books (and possibly, film).
Since the term “snogging” has been used a lot in connection with this tag, and to protect myself from any intimations of hanky-panky, I checked the definition in several online dictionaries. Apparently snogging ranges from ‘cuddle and kiss’ and ‘make out,’ through French kissing, to more intimate activity. It usually–but not always–precludes s*x. I’ll stick to the milder meanings, thank you very much.
Okay, I had a hard time keeping this list down to only ten male literary characters. There are so many good ones out there with whom I could play kissy-face. I decided to keep my choices grounded in national, not LDS fiction, since for years that’s all I read and I have a bigger memory pool there to pull from. I also wanted to bring some new names to light.
This list is just as I made it, tossing away the fellows I wouldn’t care to snog with, so they’re in no particular order.
1. Richard Sharpe, soldier/rifleman extraordinaire from Bernard Cornwell’s novels set in the early 1800s. Sean Bean (who played him in the TV specials) isn’t too shabby, either, but he doesn’t count, because he’s real.
2. James Owen, my character from Gone for a Soldier, The Man from Shenandoah, Ride to Raton, and Trail of Storms. Doesn’t give his heart lightly, but when he does, he’s committed forever.
3. Ranger, Stephanie Plum’s mentor as a bounty hunter in the series by Janet Evanovich. Just. Plain. Dangerous.
4. The mysterious Joe Pike, from the Elvis Cole mystery novels by Robert Crais. If I were in a fight, I’d like to have Joe backing me.
5. Robert B. Parker’s Spenser. He is a private eye with the soul of a poet.
6. Rhett Butler, from Margaret Mitchell’s Gone with the Wind. A rake, a scoundrel, and a devoted father.
7. Tell Sackett from the Sackett books by Louis L’Amour. He taught me to keep my fires small, no bigger than needed.
8. Travis McGee, from the series by John D. MacDonald, who gets to live on a boat when he’s not finding killers.
9. Deep thinking Joe Leaphorn, from the Four Corners novels of Tony Hillerman. We share a love of maps.
10. The upright Shane, a traveller and ex-gunfighter, from the novel of the same name by Jack Schaefer.
Okay, you may think the list is top-heavy with bad boys, but it isn’t really. Only about four, actually. They’re mysterious, hunky, men of action, but not bad through and through.
Who is on your list?
I will be at Table 46 in Room 403 throughout the day, except when I am giving my presentation, “Literacy Begins at Home: Build Reading into Family Activities,” from 11:00 to 11:30 a.m. in Room 401.
